Category Archives: Mindset
Dieting – The Binge Eating Cycle
Let’s face it…Self control isn’t infinite and if you feel deprived on a regular basis, eventually you are going to binge. And then that binge usually leads to guilt, which in turn leads to another binge and then guilt….and then potentially another binge until you finally go back to restricting what you eat.
But you can’t eat healthily and eat exactly what you want all the time. You simply can’t eat burritos and frozen yogurt every night no matter how good it tastes.
But you also can’t DEPRIVE yourself of the food you love for too long because if you do, at some point you are going to give into deprivation and go and eat it anyway. You also most definitely can’t starve yourself because not eating enough is also going to lead to binging and won’t get you results any faster (For all you women that eat only like 500 calories a day, I wrote a post for you about how you may actually be HINDERING your progress because you are STARVING yourself!)
So if you can’t eat exactly what you want any time you want it, but you also can’t deprive yourself of the food you love, what the heck do you do if you want to be healthy?
You don’t restrict yourself…Or at least you do so as little as possible.
I’ve mentioned this before, but when making diet changes, you really have two options – go all in or make small changes.
Which one you do is really dependent on you.
For some people, it is best to go all in at the beginning because any temptation at the beginning away from the clean eating habits they want to instill will lead to a binge.
For others, “going all in” leads to feelings of deprivation, which in turn leads to binging.
So when starting to make healthier choices, you need to decide which one will work best for you.
Then you also need to figure out what triggers your feelings of deprivation. What makes you feel like you are restricted and can’t indulge?
Is it not having dessert at night? Is it that you miss that salty snack in the afternoon? Is it when you get stressed and just want to eat?
Once you figure out your triggers, you can PLAN for them.
You can have healthy alternatives on hand when you know you may need them.
Like for me…I grew up eating dessert every night so when I’m stressed or tired or just not in the right frame of mind, I start craving dessert.
But instead of completely depriving myself, I’ve found healthy alternatives that satisfy me. Like a piece of dark chocolate or some delicious fresh fruit. And honestly for me this works because I physically feel way better and SATISFIED.
It’s not that a pint of ice cream doesn’t still sometimes sound good, but for me most of the time it just isn’t worth it. I would rather my chocolate bar.
Basically what you need to do is nip the craving in the bud. If you let that craving fester, you are doing to feel deprived and eventually not care what you eat and binge.
If you just deal with the craving, you are going to be way better off.
And right now your probably thinking…”Ok well sometimes a healthy alternative isn’t good enough.”
This is where I say…”Well it’s not about perfect…It’s about eating well 80% of the time and indulging 20%. Dealing with the craving could be indulging occasionally when you really really want something or it could be planning in a cheat.”
There are definitely times when you just really really want that cookie, that bag of chips, that snack that everyone else at the office is indulging in.
And sometimes it is ok to give in.
But if you indulge in that thing that you truly want, don’t allow it to be an excuse to binge.
Indulging and enjoying things you love isn’t bad!
You shouldn’t freak out if you eat a calorie that isn’t on your “diet program!” (Shoot you shouldn’t freak out if you go on vacation and indulge for a week because you’ve got to enjoy life!)
It isn’t a big deal!
If you stress about not being perfect with your diet, that stress is what will TRULY lead to binging. Because that stress is what makes you feel restricted and turns one little indulgence into a year-long binge.
If you really want to eat well, you’ve got to realize healthy living is a LIFE-LONG PROCESS. It isn’t about perfection day in and day out. It is about trying to simply eat whole natural foods as often as you can while STILL enjoying life!
So don’t stress yourself out about dieting. Don’t make yourself feel deprived and completely restricted.
If you LOVE Thanksgiving food or Christmas food or have one restaurant you go to occasionally on a Friday night, indulge on that day! Don’t deprive yourself of things that you love! That one day, one meal isn’t going to destroy all your hard work! What will destroy your healthy lifestyle is stressing about the indulgence and NOT enjoying to the fullest! Feel satisfied when you indulge, not guilty, because satisfaction leads to adherence in the long run, which is what truly matters!
So now the question is…Are you caught in the binge eating cycle? What do you do so that you ENJOY eating well and don’t feel deprived?
Stronger Than Yesterday
So yesterday I participated in a team mud run with a few clients from the gym.
One of the women I convinced to participate was super nervous…and I mean super nervous.
She kept saying, “I don’t want to get hurt. I don’t think I can do this. I’ve never done anything like this…”
But guess what!?!
She did it!
Post run haha
She even said to me at the end that she had to work on certain things for NEXT TIME.
NEXT TIME!
She had been so scared that I basically had to beg her to show up today and now she was talking about NEXT TIME.
YES!
While I was glad she had fun, I was even more excited that she had gained a new respect and confidence in her own abilities. She had done something outside her comfort zone and became more empowered because of it.
Very often, like in Patti’s case, we hold ourselves back. We tell ourselves we CAN’T do it so we don’t. We feel way more COMFORTABLE in the safe little realm we’ve built for ourselves.
We shy away from things that may leave us exposed and vulnerable – that may bring failure and defeat. Many of us fear failure and a blow to our ego more than we enjoy success.
But if we never risk failure, we will never truly know success.
Plain and simple.
Which is why I always push myself and those around me to push the boundaries of their comfort zone…
Just like Patti did.
Just like Patti has done since she started at the gym as an intimidated newbie because she didn’t want to end up like her aunt who was immobile and ill.
Patti, you are an inspiration to us all! Fifty three and looking sexy and strong!
Are they all just excuses?
Let’s face it, if you want something bad enough, you are going to do whatever it takes to get there.
“Where there’s a will, there’s a way.”
End of story.
And I’m getting really sick of all the excuses that we make about why we CAN’T live a healthier lifestyle.
Not enough time. Too tired. Too busy. It’s not working quick enough. Stress. I NEED the bad food. I NEED the cheat. Healthy food is too expensive. There aren’t options easily available. I don’t like it. I don’t know how. I’m just not one of those people. At least it is better…Right? I can’t do that…..
I’m pretty sure everyone out there has said at least one of those at some point.
And frankly, they are just all excuses.
We all make them, myself included, but that doesn’t change the fact that they are simply excuses – they are simply us letting ourselves off the hook for something we know we SHOULD be doing.
And we only seem to make excuses when we don’t value our goal enough. Because let’s face it, if you have a powerful reason WHY you want to accomplish something, you are going to make it happen. As I said before, “Where there’s a will, there’s a way.”
So if you figure out WHY your goal is truly important to you, your WILL will be strong enough to find a way.
Oh but…You DO really really want to feel like you are in better shape. You really do want to workout 3 times a week.
There just truly isn’t time for you to go to the gym.
HA!
For one, you don’t need to go to the gym. Here is a body weight workout you can do at home.
Two, you don’t need that much time to workout! Really you don’t have 15 minutes three days each week to workout!?! Really!?!
Come on!
That’s right…You DO actually have time. You just haven’t sought out a way to make it happen.
Instead you’ve just made excuses.
Same goes for healthy eating. People tell me they don’t have time to cook. Or that eating healthily is just too expensive.
Honestly, those excuses are both CRAP.
For one, it doesn’t take that long to cook especially if you just take one day and prep meals for the entire week.
Two, there are LOTS of places to buy great, healthy foods that aren’t that expensive. Even Walmart is now carrying local produce! And farmer’s markets are another great less expensive option.
Three, you can do lots of quick fixes to make things healthier without spending more money.
Can’t spring for grass-fed beef?
Fine…But make your traditionally farmed meat better by cooking it in grass-fed butter, olive oil or coconut oil.
There are small little changes you can make, that aren’t more expensive, that can make a big difference!
So take a couple of minutes this weekend and think about all of the reasons WHY you CAN’T do something.
Then make a decision…
Do you really want to accomplish your goal?
If the answer is truly yes, they buckle down and find a way to overcome the excuses.
Stop giving yourself the option to fail. Buckle down and DO IT!
Track your progress
Yesterday I mentioned that one of the main reasons why people don’t accomplish their goals, like their goal of being able to do a pull up, is because they don’t track their progress.
And most people know they should keep track. But they don’t.
They don’t track their progress because it takes energy and time. Of course, in the end, it really takes way less time to outline and track a program than it does to flounder around for months with no clear idea of how to reach your goal, but whatever…right?
Just keep floundering and not tracking. Just keep wondering why you haven’t hit your goal even though you’ve been working hard trying all these diets and spending long hours in the gym.
Really is spending a few minutes each day keeping a food log or recording weights and reps really that awful? Is it really that big a pain in the butt?
Is it really harder/more time-consuming/more frustrating than not reaching your goal?
There are even APPS for tracking now which really gives you NO EXCUSE not to track your progress!
And I’m not saying it isn’t annoying. Because guess what? It kind of is…but it is also probably the single best thing you can do to keep yourself moving forward toward your goal.
If you don’t track your progress, you won’t know what worked and what didn’t work. There are so many different workout variables out there you need to consider when creating a program (intensity, duration of workout, rest periods, type of exercises, number of exercises, reps, sets, weights, body parts worked, movement patterns worked…). And if you don’t track which types of each thing you used, how can you possibly know what helped your or hindered your progress?
You won’t know.
You won’t know if you get better results with shorter workouts. You won’t know whether or not 5 or 15 reps works better for you. You won’t know what helped you finally do that pull up…or what kept you from even getting close!
You also won’t know if you’ve gotten closer to your goal until you’ve hit it.
And if you don’t hit it soon enough, you may give up because you don’t FEEL like you’ve gotten any closer.
I mean how many times have you started on a goal only to give up because you’ve spent time working toward your goal only to feel like you haven’t gotten any closer?
Probably more often than you’d care to admit.
BUT if you’d tracked your workouts and diet and TRACKED YOUR PROGRESS, you would have concrete evidence showing that you are closer to your goal now than when you started even if you don’t necessarily FEEL closer because you aren’t there yet.
Often we get down on ourselves and FEEL like we haven’t made progress just because we aren’t exactly where we would want to be.
But when we’ve tracked our progress, we can remind ourselves of all our hard work and show ourselves all of the victories we’ve had no matter how small. And even those small victories can be enough to keep us motivated.
No matter how we FEEL we can’t argue with concrete progress. And even when we feel down, seeing those results, seeing that progress toward our goal, will keep us moving forward.
It is way easier to give up when we don’t see any forward momentum.
Whether or not you admit it…seeing even the smallest victory can be motivating.
Heck, even the victory of TRACKING can be motivating. You want to give yourself small things each day that you can easily ACCOMPLISH and keeping a food log or recording your numbers is just such a task.
Tracking, while we complain that it is hard and time-consuming, really isn’t. It truly is a “low barrier to entry” task that you can do in a matter of minutes. It is a small, easy task that you can do each day which gets you moving in the right direction.
When we ACCOMPLISH things, even small, easy tasks, we feel successful. And when we feel successful, we feel MOTIVATED to continue working hard toward our goals.
And the final, and probably MOST IMPORTANT REASON, why you should track your diet and exercise programs is because you don’t see yourself, your habits and your daily activities clearly and you don’t hold yourself accountable for what you are actually doing.
I’m sorry…but you don’t.
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had someone tell me they are eating well only to retract their statement when they actually keep a food log.
They aren’t aware of how often they take “just one bite.” They aren’t aware of how often they DON’T actually have fruits or vegetables with their meals. They aren’t aware of how quickly “handfuls,” “bites,” “pieces” added up.
They aren’t aware.
Tracking makes us aware and makes us hold ourselves accountable.
It makes us aware of what works and what doesn’t. It makes us aware of our progress, even the smallest of victories. It makes us aware that we are doing things each day that move us closer and closer to success.
So if you’ve been struggling to reach your goals, if you’ve given up on goals more than you’d care to remember, maybe you should start tracking your progress with food and workout logs….
Are We Our Own Worst Enemy?
So Saturday I hosted two workshops at the Limitless Women’s Conference.
The slogan for the conference was “I can. I will. I AM.”
And the goal of the conference was to inspire people to have more faith in themselves…To make people believe in themselves!
Because let’s face it…most people never make changes or better their lives not because they don’t have the ability or resources, not because someone else holds them back, not even because someone else tells them that they can’t…
But because they tell themselves, “I can’t. I won’t. I’m not.”
Most people are their own worst enemies.
We shoot ourselves down before we even give ourselves a shot. We look at our long-term goal and see just how far off we are from it, and maybe even think about the times before when we’ve failed, and give up either before we even gotten started or at the slightest sign of struggle.
We have it in our mind that success is a straight line and we get so focused on the end result that we can’t see all the small successes we achieve every day.
I mean think about it…How many times have you gotten down on yourself because you aren’t there YET instead of thinking about all the great things you’ve done today and the last few days, weeks and months to get yourself increasingly closer to your goal?
LIke all the time right!?!
STOP!
Stop being your worst enemy and start believing in yourself!
And building that confidence doesn’t happen overnight. It also doesn’t happen just because you hit your big goal.
You actually build confidence through small victories.You need to celebrate even the tiniest of successes because even small successes build momentum and get you closer to your goal.
The small successes add up both in terms of actual results and MINDSET – actually most importantly in terms of MINDSET.
When you start to BELIEVE you CAN, you WILL.
When you set even the easiest, most simple goal and accomplish it, you will believe more in yourself.
It sounds stupid. But trust me it really really works.
When I have days where I’m stressed and I don’t even want to get started on work, I write down on my list some really stupid and simple tasks just so I can cross them off pretty early in the day and already feel like I’ve gotten a ton of stuff down.
For example, I check my email every morning when I wake up, but sometimes when I feel overloaded, I will actually write down on my daily task list, “check email” just so I can basically get up and cross something off my list. Seeing one thing done always motivates me to get started. And even then, I don’t necessarily do the things that NEED to be done first, I do the things that have the lowest barrier to entry first.
Why?
Because those small successes and accomplishments get the momentum going on days when I don’t even want to get started!
So start today. Make a list of easy and small things you can start doing that will at least prepare you to move forward on your goal.
Once you get the momentum going, the bigger changes won’t seem as daunting.
So stop telling yourself “NO..I can’t. I won’t. I’m not.”
Find even the smallest piece that you CAN DO today and start with that. Let everything else fall in to place as you progress.
One step at a time!!!
Real Role Models
So as I’ve been preparing for this Women’s Conference this weekend, I’ve been thinking a lot about female role models and the transformative power of exercise/sports.
And then the other week, when Ryan and I were watching TV, I stumbled across a woman who’d undergone a great transformation and was also a GREAT role model – Nicole Eggert.
So I don’t know how many of you have seen the show “SPLASH”…And it is actually really really stupid but for some reason we watched it anyway…And now I’m sort of glad we did because I came across Nicole…
But anyway, it is a diving show in which celebrities who have never dived before compete.
And Nicole Eggert, a lifeguard on Baywatch, was one of the participants.
Nicole in her Wonder Woman suit. YES!
I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again – sports and exercise are incredibly empowering.
Over the course of the show, you saw a huge transformation in Nicole. She became stronger, more confident and empowered as she overcame physical challenges day in and day out.
At the beginning of the show, you could tell that she wasn’t confident in her body or in her abilities. But she had decided to compete and didn’t want to give up with her daughter looking on. She even bounced back after suffering a bad fall when practicing one of her dives publicly before the show.
She could have given up and even done an easier dive when she fell from the board in warm up.
But she didn’t.
She had worked hard and she was willing to risk everything to prove to herself that she COULD do it.
And guess what!?!
She did do it!
And each week, her dives got better and you could see her confidence grow.
Nicole wasn’t a world-class athlete competing for huge rewards. Many people won’t even remember what she did because she didn’t end up evening winning the Splash title.
But she was a REAL woman working hard to overcome challenges she’d never faced before. She was a REAL woman battling the same self-doubt that most of us women struggle with daily.
Nicole did probably the hardest thing that many of us could do – she put herself out there and risked failure…and in this case…very public failure.
She put herself outside her comfort zone and didn’t give up when the going got rough. She competed to the very end.
Nicole was a REAL woman who found REAL STRENGTH through sports.
Nicole is a REAL role model.
So this weekend, decide to become your own real role model. Set some goals and take a risk to achieve something you previously thought impossible.
One less decision to make
So I had coffee with a great friend and inspirational woman today and we got onto the subject of females and personal training.
She mentioned that her significant other said to her the other day, “Why do you need a personal trainer still? You’ve worked with a whole bunch of different ones enough that you know a ton about working out already. You could easily design your own workouts.”
She said her response to him was, “But I don’t want to have to make the decisions. I don’t want to have to decide what exercises to do and what weight to use. I already have to make a bazillion choices every day!”
She then looked at me and said, “Having a personal trainer, having your workouts designed for you, is one less decision we, women, who are already overloaded with choices every day, have to make.”
Life is a balancing act…why add one more thing every day to our plate?
Working out for many women is their one chance during the day to really do something for themselves. A time when they don’t have to make any decisions or worry about what anyone else needs. It is a chance for them to focus on themselves- to have some ME time.
And while I know that not everyone is like me and that some women do, in fact, enjoy running, I think that many women turn to the cardio machines because it is an EASY decision. They don’t have to think about what they are going to do – they can just get on and go until they are tired.
Whereas coming up with a workout when you get to the gym (and figuring out what equipment to use when a lot of the weight room space taken over) is more challenging and not near as relaxing.
So some women either avoid lifting weights or they turn to classes and personal trainers.
And while, of course, I’m in favor of using a personal trainer, I do think that you CAN great your own workouts without adding in the stress of making a whole bunch of decisions when you get to the gym.
And one of those ways is to sit down and plan out your workouts for the week, or even the month, ahead of time.
I mean think about it…It is way less stressful when you plan out, and even cook, your meals ahead of time. Then when you are tired and stressed out during the week, you don’t have to figure out what to make and then spend time cooking it. You also don’t get the urge to just eat anything because you are too tired to care.
Same thing goes for working out. When you create your workouts ahead of time, and I don’t just mean earlier that day, you create workouts that will challenge you and help you grow.
Whereas a lot of the time when we have to design something in the moment, we design something based on how we feel – which sometimes can mean doing 10 push ups instead of 20…or using half the weight we should be using.
It can even mean that we skip the workout altogether because we just don’t have the energy to make another decision.
So take a second and think…After a long day at work, do you do the workout that requires the least amount of thought or the one that will get you the best results?
Maybe planning out your workouts ahead of time (or getting a personal trainer) may be just want you need to hit your goals!
Do you plan out your workouts?
ESPN 30 for 30 – 26 Years: The Dewey Bozella Story
So occasionally Ryan and I will watch the ESPN series 30 for 30.
They are always interesting and while some are uplifting, many of the stories are about athletes that weren’t able to live up to the hype or that were in some way prevented from living up to their full potential – many are stories of “what if?”.
What if the person hadn’t gotten injured? What if the person had gotten another shot? What if….?
For me stories of “what if?” are always a slight bit depressing and leave me rambling on to Ryan for hours after about all of the “what ifs?”.
But last night I watched one of the most motivational documentaries I’ve seen in a long time – one that really spoke to me.
It was the Dewey Bozella Story. Below is his basic biography. I took it from his website as I didn’t want to leave anything out.
In 1983, Bozella’s life took a dramatic turn when he was convicted of a murder he did not commit. Sentenced to 20 years to life in Sing Sing prison, Bozella maintained his innocence and exhausted every appeal. He was offered more than four separate chances for an early release if he would only admit guilt and show remorse, but Bozella consistently refused to accept freedom under such conditions. Anger at his imprisonment gave way to determination and instead of becoming embittered, he became a model prisoner: earning his GED, bachelors and masters degrees; working as a counselor for other prisoners; and eventually even falling in love and getting married. Through it all, Bozella found strength and purpose through boxing, becoming the light heavyweight champion of Sing Sing Prison.
Unyielding in his innocence, Bozella never gave up fighting in or out of the ring. He wrote to the Innocence Project daily in his quest for a ray of hope. The law firm WilmerHale eventually took on Bozella’s case and uncovered new evidence that exonerated him. After being in prison more than 26 years, he was finally released in October 2009. Today, Bozella devotes his life to helping others, working with a non-profit that helps recently released prisoners rehabilitate back into the world. He has also returned to boxing as a trainer to kids and aspiring fighters, all the while maintaining his dream to fight one professional fight as a free man.
On July 13th, 2011, Dewey Bozella was honored with the Arthur Ashe Courage Award at The 2011 ESPYs. The 2011 ESPYs celebrated the courage and conviction that lead Bozella to the ultimate path of freedom after 26 years of imprisonment. Following the awards, Dewey Bozella realized his dream of becoming a professional boxer, winning his first pro fight on October 15th, 2011 on the undercard for Bernard versus Dawson.
Just reading this story again touches me.
I don’t know what it is…Maybe it is his un-wavering determination or his refusal to give up hope. Maybe its the fact that he worked to always make the best of his situation. Maybe it is the fact that he never comprised his integrity and refused to lie even for his freedom. Maybe it was his courage and conviction. Maybe it was the fact that he found empowerment and strength through sports.
Maybe it was the fact that he never gave up and got, at least a little, to realize “what if?”.
No, he will never know if he could have been one of the best professional boxers had he not been imprisoned during his prime, but at least he knew he could have been great…and there is some peace in that.
At least he never gave up on his dream and did everything he could to get it.
“Never let fear determine who you are,” said Bozella. “Never let where you come from determine where you’re going.”
Some of us never get started because we hate failing, we fear failing, maybe even more than we love winning.
Bozella failed time and time again and never gave up because he knew that winning was worth it.
While we may not be fighting for our freedom or our chance to compete in a professional sport, we are all fighting for some victory no matter how small.
The question is…will we let our fear of failure get in the way or will we realize that always asking “what if?” is far worse?
NOTE: I would like to take a second and also recognize some of the really inspiration things going on in athletics right now. We have some really brave athletes on our hands. Whether or not they will be recognized for their bravery or burned for it has yet to truly be seen, but I will continue to hope for the best!
How do you define “strength?”
So I think I’ve been going through a little bit of a working out/healthy living identity crisis the last few months.
Actually I know I have. And I’m sorry if this post is ramble-y, but I felt I just needed to talk…er….write…through my existential crisis.
I’m not really sure what to do with myself. I don’t have anything specific that I really really want to train for right now.
I had thought about doing another kettlebell competition, but honestly, I don’t have a passion for it.
I just don’t enjoy the training process.
With working out, I don’t want to spend time doing something that I don’t enjoy….just so I can compete. I like to LOVE what I do.
So I’ve been racking my brain with what to do NEXT.
Recently, I’ve been experimenting and lifting heavy, which has been fun, but I don’t like not having direction.
So I’ve been trying to list out what I love…what inspires me…what drives me…what fascinates me and seems like a challenge.
It’s funny, but my list doesn’t keep going back to a sport or competition…
It keeps going back to the words…STRENGTH…EMPOWERMENT…
They have become my obsession.
But you can find strength and empowerment in so many different ways.
I mean…What really is STRENGTH?
We, women, are now told so many different things.
This is what came up when I googled female strength…interesting…
We are told that “strong is the new skinny.”
We are told that real girls lift heavy.
And at the same time we are even told we shouldn’t be strong. That lifting heavy makes us bulky and unfeminine. We are told to do cardio and use Barbie weights.
We have so many conflicting expectations put on us that it is honestly impossible sometimes to know what do to.
There are so many definitions of what being female and strong should mean. But what does it really mean to YOU?
Does it mean lifting a ton of weight and showing the boys how it is done? Does “strong is the new skinny” speak to you?
What does STRENGTH mean?
For the longest time, I defined it by how many matches I could win. Then it was how much I could lift. Then it was whether or not I could complete the Versa Climber, Power Ropes and Kettlebell challenges.
I defined it by my accomplishments. When I proved I could DO something, that made me feel stronger.
But then I just wanted more. Yet…I didn’t have a desire necessarily to go any further with the challenges I had already taken on.
I love powerlifting…And yes would I love to be able to lift more?
OF COURSE!
Yet I don’t love it enough to want to work my butt off day in and day out to be the best powerlifter I could be.
And I don’t like doing anything half way!
So instead I do it whole-heartedly for a bit, compete, and then move on so that I can experiment and try something new!
And I guess I figured that eventually I’d find something that I’d want to commit to for the long haul. I mean…that is what I’m used to. I played tennis for the first 20 some years of my life!
And on top of that…II see all the “strong” women around me in the fitness field completely and utterly committed to one thing. They are all lifting heavy trying to hit the top numbers they can. And they keep going after it…day in and day out.
But as I’ve struggled this last month to figure out what I want next, I’ve realized that maybe what I’m after is something way less solid than winning a competition or hitting a new PR in lifting.
Maybe what I’m after is TRUE STRENGTH.
Because when I asked myself the same question I asked you above, “What is strength?”, I didn’t answer lifting 300lbs.
I answered, “I want to FEEL stronger.”
What a vague answer…GREAT.
At first I didn’t think it solved anything and it frustrated me even more that I couldn’t even describe strength to myself.
But then I realized that I had.
Strength wasn’t necessarily a lifting PR. It wasn’t running faster or jumping higher or proving I could win a competition.
It was a FEELING.
Strength was something I FELT because I’d overcome something. Because I’d challenged myself with something and had spent time working hard to accomplish it.
True strength to me was confidence.
It was my ability to believe more in myself.
To believe that I could do anything I set my mind to.
To me strength is the ability to put myself outside of my comfort zone and accomplish something beyond what I originally believed possible.
I’ve been so worried for the longest time about being the best at something…About lifting more or being physically stronger in one specific way.
But I realize that it wasn’t being physically stronger that really made me feel strong. It was the empowerment I felt when I could DO something.
When I could lift that weight I wasn’t necessarily supposed to be able to lift. When I could do something that I couldn’t do before.
So while I LOVE lifting heavy, strength isn’t measured by how much you lift.
Strength is measured by how much you challenge yourself and push yourself to do something outside your comfort zone.
To me strength has meant so many different things in terms of the physical, but only one thing when it comes to the mental.
Strength is how much you believe in yourself, not the actual acts that you do.
Strength can be gotten through so many different workout avenues…you just have to push yourself to go beyond what you thought possible.
So now I ask you one more time, “What does strength mean to you?”
Confidence – Victories Build Upon Victories
So you often hear New Years resolutions and people coming into the gym with a goal of losing weight, getting healthier, being more toned, feeling better.
But what is their REAL reason WHY?
Honestly, it really isn’t to look better. Or even to get healthier most of the time.
It is to be more CONFIDENT!
I mean why do you want to look better? Is it really just for the sake of looking better? Or is it because you want to FEEL better about yourself – be more CONFIDENT in how you look?
Do you really want to get healthier? Or do you want to be MORE CONFIDENT in you health – know that when you wake up you will have the energy to tackle the day and won’t constantly be falling ill?
Yup…Underlying just about every health and fitness goal is a person’s real WHY – CONFIDENCE.
And while I would say this is definitely the case for women, I think it is also true for men.
Even high level athletes train to have more confidence. Yes, they train to get stronger…But they really train because they want to be CONFIDENT that they can win.
A healthy lifestyle is all about confidence no matter what terms you actually use to describe your goal.
That is why having a measurable goal, which is broken down into SHORT-TERM goals, is so important.
A big part of confidence is seeing progress – seeing SUCCESS…no matter how small.
When we accomplish something, there is definitely a feeling of pride, a feeling of CONFIDENCE.
I know that is why I make a daily task list. I love the feeling of success and accomplishment that I get when I cross something off of my to-do list!
Even if it is something small. Honestly, I usually even start with the easiest and smallest task for the day because it is the least daunting and seems quick and painless. AND it gets the momentum going because once I’ve finished something and see the list start to get smaller, I feel even more motivated to continue.
Usually getting the momentum going is the hardest part, which is why it is so important to start with something small. Easy to accomplish tasks present a lower barrier to entry…aka they make it seem less intimidating to get started on a difficult task.
So while your long-term goal may be something that will take months or even years to accomplish (and may seem incredibly daunting at the moment), your short-term goals should be things you can accomplish daily or even weekly.
You NEED to have easy to accomplish short-term goals, especially at the beginning because those quick and easy victories will get the momentum rolling.
And when you start seeing success, no matter how small, your confidence will build. And as your confidence builds, you will perform better, feel better, and even look better.
So if you want to accomplish all those more “superficial” goals like losing weight, getting more toned, being healthier, you first have to target the real reason you want all of those things – CONFIDENCE!
P.S. By superficial I don’t mean not important…your health is VERY important and does drive people to eat better or workout, but if you build your confidence, those other goals don’t seem near as intimidating or out of reach!
Man Bicep 