Workouts should make you feel BETTER!
The other day I went to a health fair as one of the vendors and a woman from a massage and chiropractor office came over to me and started talking to me about training.
She told me one of her massage therapists was super into Crossfit and that they got a TON of business from there. She said to me, “Oh you know how it is with all that super intense exercise….So many people get injuries, but it is worth it.”
I’m honestly not sure what I said in response because all I could think was, “UHMMM…NO…Actually I don’t because people come to me feeling crappy with maybe some aches and pains and my intention is to make them feel BETTER not WORSE.”
And I’m not meaning to bash Crossfit here because, to be honest, there are a lot of idiots out there in the fitness industry in a lot of different capacities. Heck, stupid people training themselves injury themselves. But with the popularity of Crossfit increasing, there are going to be more and more idiot trainers flocking to it. It’s that way with anything that becomes popular.
Anyway….My point is that WORKOUTS SHOULDN’T MAKE YOU FEEL WORSE!
I’m not exactly sure when or why a good workout became defined as a workout that murders you. I’m not exactly sure when or why it became cool to be injured.
But let me assure you…It isn’t.
And five years down the road, when other injuries have popped up because you didn’t properly rehab your “cool” injury, you won’t be thinking that pushing through the pain was all that darn awesome.
Workouts can be GOOD and even hard without leading to injury or making you feel like death every time after you finish.
Every workout doesn’t have to feel like a slaughter.
Actually every workout SHOULDN’T feel that way if you are truly interested in getting results.
Just because someone else, who you think you should be lifting as much as, is lifting a certain weight doesn’t mean YOU are ready to lift it.
YOU CAN’T RUSH THINGS OR COMPARE YOURSELF TO OTHERS! Workouts are a BUILDING process. And that progress isn’t going to be a straight line up!
Heck the same is true about LIFE!
And if you don’t respect the process, you are going to get injured and workouts aren’t going to make you feel better like they should!!!
A couple of months ago, I had this new guy join my latest evening class.
One of the first exercises we did was a single leg deadlift. Because he hadn’t done the move before and hadn’t done much balance or core work recently, he had to use very light weights.
At the end of the workout, he comes up to me a little downtrodden and says, “I was doing way less weight than some of the people I know I should be doing more than.”
I said to him, “Why should you be doing more than them?” I, of course, knew he meant he should be doing more than them because they were older than him and female and he thought as a younger man he should have more strength than them. And he is, in fact, “stronger” than them in that he probably has more natural brut strength.
But when he stated what I mentioned above I said, “But they have done this before AND they have BUILT UP TO IT! Their bodies are ready to handle the load while doing the movement.”
He then said to me, “Well if I held the weight this way or did a double leg move, I could do more.”
I then said, “But this move builds up all the small muscles so that you can lift even MORE when we progress to those bigger, heavier lifts. Plus just because you can lift it, doesn’t really mean your body is ready to.”
He didn’t seem completed convinced. But he has been putting in the work and remained patient.
And guess what? The workouts have been making him feel BETTER and STRONGER every single day.
He just had to stop worrying about what other people were doing or the weight his was doing.
He had to focus on HIS GOALS.
So if your workouts aren’t making you FEEL BETTER, are they really worth it?
Are you too caught up in doing gnarly workouts instead of staying focused on what truly matters?
Yonanas Recipe – Banana Raspberry Chocolate Chunk Ice Cream
My sister got Ryan and I a Yonanas for our wedding….She knows us pretty well!
And while I don’t believe in baking “healthy” desserts with a ton of ingredients that really shouldn’t be consumed that way or in that quantity, I am a fan of SIMPLE, healthy desserts that minimally process the foods they use.
So last night we tried out the Yonanas.
I was nervous to use it because I didn’t want to be disappointed after seeing it turn frozen fruit into very creamy “frozen yogurt” on the TV.
And I must say…The Yonanas didn’t disappoint!
Yesterday was a carb day and I wanted to end it with a nice sweet and healthy treat, especially after our 4 mile walk on the beach.
So we pulled out the frozen banana pieces Ryan had put in the fridge days before and some frozen raspberries and 70% dark chocolate.
Here is our Banana Raspberry Chocolate Chunk Yonanas Ice Cream:
Ingredients for two servings:
2 Bananas (we froze them in quarters for easier use)
1 cup Raspberries (frozen)
4 squares (about 2 oz) 70% dark chocolate bar
Take the frozen ingredients out of the freezer and let thaw for a minute. They work a lot better if not completely frozen solid.
Add one quarter of the banana to the Yonanas with a few of the raspberries and some small chunks of chocolate. Turn on the Yonanas and press the ingredients through.
Continue adding more alternating bananas, raspberries and chocolate until it is all gone. Make sure that as you add the chocolate, you’ve already broken it down into smaller pieces.
After you’ve Yonana-sized it all (my new word for processing all the ingredients), give it one good stir and enjoy.
It literally is the creamy texture of frozen yogurt!
Can’t wait to try out some really fun flavors. Look for a pumpkin and a coffee one coming soon!
Women, Fitspo and Putting Yourself First
The other day I posted an article critiquing the fitspo below to Facebook.
I was interested to hear what everyone else thought not only of the photo but also of the critique.
Personally, the fitspo doesn’t bother me. I’m not necessarily a huge fan of the saying, which has been posted on a ton of different pictures, BUT I like what she stands for and what she shows is possible.
But it does sound like the fitspo bothers quiet a few women.
Which I can truly understand.
I am not a mother. I’ll be upfront about that. But I am a woman. And I am a woman with a great desire to empower every other woman I come in contact with.
Which is why many of the critiques of the photo really really struck a nerve and made me angry.
Ok yes…”What your excuse?” may not have been the best phrase. But that is really what we are focusing on? Ok she was PROUD of her body so decided to show it off. And we are condemning her for her body acceptance?
I’m sorry but the real issue isn’t the photo. It is the fact that most of the complaints about Maria Kang and the photo all seem to stem from the fact that most women feel obligated to take care of others FIRST.
It’s almost like women try to shame each other into NOT taking care of themselves instead of supporting those women who do make the decision to take care of themselves first.
Society, in my opinion, tells women to put their family first. To take care of others and make sure their needs are met before their own.
But being a good wife, good mother, good friend doesn’t have to mean putting others before yourself.
I think taking care of yourself FIRST actually makes you a better person and more able to support others.
If we aren’t healthy or happy how can we TRULY support others? I mean let’s face it….We are way better friends when we can truly listen and help – when we are self-possessed and happy and feeling good.
And all too often I feel like those women who put themselves first, who make sure they are healthy and happy so that they can support others, are condemned. They are told they aren’t good mothers. Or actually criticized for not putting their children first.
I even saw a comment saying that Maria Kang wasn’t a good role model.
A good role model?
Is the mother who is self-sacrificing really a good role model?!?! Is the mother who puts everyone before herself a good role model!?!
No! I’m sorry…She isn’t.
I would never want my daughter to think that she has to put everyone around her before herself. I would want her to know that her needs and wants and dreams and goals shouldn’t come SECOND.
That SHE IS IMPORTANT. That she doesn’t have to blindly follow traditional expectations. That she can be a wildly successful career woman and still be a great mom.
That she CAN HAVE IT ALL.
I can accept that people don’t like the slogan. But seriously all this negativity about a stupid picture makes me feel like we are burying a more important message.
Like we, women, are so focused on this “thin” vs. “fat” thing that we are almost holding each other back from overcoming more important things.
I will finish with this last statement….The other day I was reading about successful women who had become CEOs and business owners and how many of them, instead of mentoring another generation of women to become successful too, actually did very little to help other women because they felt their grasp on success wasn’t secure enough.
In many ways those successful women did more to hold other women back from gaining equal, or even greater, success.
And honestly, that is kind of what all the criticisms of this picture feel like to me. It feels like we are too scared to recognize her success and the fact that she broke with traditional values and PUT HERSELF FIRST so we criticize and tear down a freaking photo.
The end. That is all this non-mother, but girl who was raised by a strong mother, has to say.
Bodyweight Workout Routine – Slowing Down The Tempo
Ok so I’m tired of people telling me that they don’t have time to go to the gym and, therefore, they don’t have time to go to the gym.
Here is a workout that DOESN’T require the gym…aka it doesn’t require ANY equipment. And it will challenge even the most advanced lifter!
I’ve mentioned before that there are a ton of ways to advance moves WITHOUT using weight. I’ve shown you more difficult variations of moves…like single limb moves. I’ve shown you how to challenge yourself using a towel.
And now I’m going to show you how to create a challenging workout by slowing down the tempo of your repetitions. Each exercise is done SUPER SLOW. While all the tempos are slow, the emphasis is put on different parts of the movement so pay attention to what the tempo says!
Total Body Bodyweight Workout!
WARM UP
Roll out any particularly tight spots and do dynamic stretches for calves, hamstrings, hips, core, chest, shoulders, and upper back.
STRENGTH
Perform 3-4 rounds of each superset. Complete all rounds before moving on to the next superset. Rest for 1-2 minutes between each superset.
Superset #1
TEMPO 5/0/1 8-12 reps each side Single Skater Lunge (5 count squat down toward ground, no pause at bottom and quick push back up. Like a single leg deadlift EXCEPT that as you lean forward and hinge toward the ground you are actually going to bend that standing leg as low as you can. So it is a combination deadlift and squat. The back leg doesn’t need to stay straight.)
TEMPO 1/5/1 8-12 reps Posterior Plank (Quick up, 5 count hold at top and quick back down. To do this move sit on the ground with your legs out straight and your hands behind you. Point your finger tips toward your butt. Lift up onto your heels and hands, keeping your legs straight and leaning your head back at the top. Get your hips up as high as possible. To even advance further, keep the tempo slow and perform a single leg plank.)
Superset #2
TEMPO 5/1/5/1/5/1 5-10 reps Push Ups (Hold 5 seconds at the top of the push up. Lower down to midway of the push up and hold 5 seconds. Lower down to the bottom and hold 5 seconds. Do not relax on the ground at the bottom. Push quickly back up to the top. You can do an incline push up or push up from your knees to regress. Choose a variation that you can do for at least 5 solid form push ups!)
TEMPO 5/1/5 Slow Skater Side Lunges (Sink down into a low side lunge. You are going to move slowly from side lunge to side lunge. Do not let your butt come up in the middle. The tempo will be a five count to move from one side to the other. Do not pause more than a second on each side.)
Superset #3
TEMPO 1/3/5 8-12 reps each side Single Leg Glute Bridge (Quick 1 second up, hold 3 seconds at the top and slow 5 count lower down to the ground. This move can be regressed to a two-leg bridge OR progressed to a bridge with your feet up on a table. Keep the tempo no matter which you do!)
TEMPO 1/5/1 8-12 reps Corner Row (Quick press out, hold 5 seconds in scapular hold and lower back down. This is basically a scapular hold with movement. Set up in a corner with an elbow on each wall as if you are going to do a scapular hold. Relax against the wall and then press up into a scapular hold on your elbows. Hold there in the scapular hold and then lower back down to the wall.)
COOLDOWN
Stretch out and roll out hamstrings, hips, glutes, chest, shoulders and upper back.
All of these moves are challenging…both physically and MENTALLY. It is always a mental challenge to force yourself to move slowly when your muscles are burning and you just want to get it over with!
Enjoy! And even try slowing down the tempo on some of your other favorite moves!
Wedding Week Part 4 – Love yourself!
I’m going to wrap up my wedding week reflections with probably one of the most important things I’ve learned, “You are never going to be happy if you can’t accept and LOVE YOURSELF.”
I stated the other day that I feel like fitness, the gym, working out, are sort of a microcosm. If you can learn to be confident and strong in the gym that confidence and strength will then translate into every day life.
And when I say that you have confidence in yourself, I’m not saying that you aren’t going to always work to improve yourself.
I’m just saying that you love yourself because of who and what you are and all of the effort you’ve put in to get there!
Found this on Pinterest the other day and really liked it.
Because of ALL THE EFFORT YOU’VE PUT IN TO GET THERE…
Almost every day I hear women complain about things they want to change about themselves. Occasionally I hear women mention something they like about themselves.
But rarely do I ever hear women say anything about all the hard work they put in to become stronger, smarter, healthier, happier, BETTER each and every day!
And as I mentioned earlier this week, the journey is the BEST part.
Everyday we choose the person we are going to be. Everyday we have a chance to reinvent ourselves and become an even better version of ourselves.
Everyday you get another chance to be who you want to be and not worry about what anyone else thinks.
Over the years I can say I’ve become more and more comfortable with myself. And it’s not because I’m perfect or because I don’t have anything I want to improve about myself.
It is because I know how hard I work each and every day to become better and stronger. It is because I know how far I’ve come and how much I’ve accomplished.
It’s because I truly really don’t care what anyone else thinks as long as I MAKE MYSELF HAPPY.
And the bulk of my strength and confidence was developed on the playing field and in the gym.
I developed it by pushing myself to compete against people who were supposed to be better than me. I developed it by putting in hard work every single day so that no matter what happened, I could at least say I gave it my all. I developed it by putting myself out there and trying new things – things that were far outside my comfort zone.
I developed it by pushing myself beyond what I thought was possible to realize what I could truly achieve.
I thought a lot about all of this when planning…and carrying out…our wedding.
We did a lot of untraditional things. A lot of things other people might not like or may even “judge” us for…aka laugh AT us not WITH us.
But honestly I didn’t care because those things represented ME and RYAN.
Loving yourself is about ACCEPTING yourself. About knowing your strengths and your flaws and giving yourself credit for the journey.
Don’t let another day go by that you aren’t proud of the person you’ve become.
Challenge yourself every day. Work hard every day. Appreciate your journey.
These are things you can control. Other people and their perceptions, you can’t control. So don’t let them influence your opinion of yourself!
Here is a little video to hopefully entertain you on this Monday! Ryan and my first dance! We are far from champion dancers…but boy did we have fun!
Healthy Eating – Keep it interesting
While keeping it simple is key to sticking with a diet and creating healthy habits, keeping things interesting is key to healthy eating longevity.
If you get bored, you are going to give up or give in to temptation.
So while I like to get the same basic groceries week in and week out and I like to make the same basic recipes over and over again, I DO make sure to change things up.
And one of my favorite ways to change thing up is by using new tools!
I love getting a food processor or blender, or pressure cooker…And learning how to use a new tool and create even more delicious meals. (I also love getting new tools so Ryan can create even more delicious meals while I chatter away to him and simply enjoy.)
For our wedding, we asked for a couple of different things….
- A cast iron stove-top reversible grill/griddle
- Pressure cooker
- Yonanas
Today we used the grill/griddle to make some delicious burgers. It’s crazy how burgers can taste so different just by changing the way you cook them!
I can’t wait to try the pressure cooker and yonanas this weekend!
While I’m not a fan of paleo baked goods or any of that crap, I am in favor of truly healthy SIMPLE treats…like frozen fruit that is made into a frozen yogurt like substance.
So now my question to all of you on this wonderful Friday is…Do you own any of the tools I listed above? And if so, what are your favorite recipes to make using them!?! Or do you have other tools that you love to use?
Stay tuned for some cool new recipes!!! YUM!
Building Confidence: Your Brain Is Really Pretty Stupid
This past week the Vanguard Volleyball team had a great victory over a tough team. But more exciting than the victory itself was the fact that they came back from one game down for the win.
That was a HUGE victory because it showed a mental toughness and a confidence in their abilities. They also didn’t get down on themselves and continued to believe even when they were behind.
And that mental toughness, that ability to believe and fight back will take them farther than talent or skill ever could.
The crazy part is that very little time is spent on developing that mental toughness and confidence in comparison to the time we spend on skill development.
So every week, I try to spend a little bit of time on their mental game.
Last night we worked on relaxation under pressure and positive self-talk. Both “drills” feel extremely cheesy and stupid.
I mean come on…who would think that cheering, “We’re awesome!” would actually make you more confident? Who would think that simply slowing down your breathing could make you relax and refocus so that you could prevail even when you are super nervous?
The thing is…That stuff does work.
And that cheesy, stupid and sort of awkwardly funny stuff works because your brain is really pretty stupid and easy to fool.
Yup that’s right…Even if you are a genius, your brain can be easily fooled into being confident and tough.
Our minds hear everything we say to ourselves.
Who do you THINK you are?
They hear us say, “I can’t do another pull up.” They hear us say, “That person, that team, is better than us.”
They hear us say, “I’m not good enough.”
But they also hear us say, “I’m AWESOME!”
And whichever we choose to say more often is what our MIND IS GOING TO BELIEVE.
Same thing goes for breathing.
If your breathing is panicked, your mind will feel anxious. If your breathing is slow and relaxed, your body and mind will feel relaxed and at ease.
It sounds strange to say, but our brain really is stupid and we can easily make it believe whatever we want it to believe.
The question is..What are you going to tell it?
Will you repeat positive thoughts so that you become more confident? Or will you bring yourself down?
If you decide you want to be more confident, try these tips to develop positive self talk!
P.S. Here are some other great posts to help you develop self-confidence and become mentally tougher!
Success builds confidence – Track your progress because even the smallest of successes can build momentum which builds confidence!
Act as if – Build self-confidence by FAKING IT!
Stop being your own worst enemy! – Believe in yourself!
Wedding Week Part 3 – How to eat clean on vacation
In my opinion, vacation is a time to forget that the word “diet” even exists and to eat anything and everything that looks good. (NOTE: I’m talking about VACATION not simply travel…aka traveling for work every week)
I will eat extra clean before and after vacation just because I want to completely relax and indulge in whatever I want the entire time I’m on vacation.
HOWEVER, there will be times when you want to FEEL and LOOK a certain way so eating whatever won’t really be something you want to do….Like the days right before you are going to get married. Or if you go on a vacation before a competition…
So then the questions arise, “How do you eat well when you can’t cook, can’t necessarily pick where and when you eat and when you still want to completely relax on your vacation and not have to stress?…And how do you continue your diet while still enjoying and not being harassed by friends and family about sticking with your diet?”
You know…The answer really is simple yet most people completely bypass it…PLAN AHEAD!
When I go on vacation, I plan ahead even if it is simply looking for fun things to do and horribly delicious bad for me food.
We plan ahead so we know what our options are and we can make sure we make the most out of our vacation.
So if you plan ahead to make sure the vacation is fun, why wouldn’t you plan ahead to make sure you make your vacation relaxing while sticking with your healthy eating plan?
Before my wedding, I didn’t want to eat a whole bunch of bad food. I wasn’t necessarily worried about how I looked. I was actually more worried about feeling crappy after eating food my body wasn’t used to.
And the last thing I wanted to feel was sick and crappy on my wedding day!
I had to enjoy some delicious cupcakes..I just made sure to use a little portion control so my tummy didn’t hurt!
Therefore before we even left, I considered what I was going to do.
I looked at restaurant options. I thought about eating schedule. Heck, I even chose to simply explain why I was going to eat a certain way.
And guess what?
I EASILY ate well the entire time and felt GREAT at the wedding!
Here is my guide to help you plan ahead so you can eat the way you want on vacation if you choose not to indulge (which also is more than OK when on vacation). These guidelines below are great if you travel a lot for work and want to eat well! And the best part is…THEY AREN’T REALLY VERY CHALLENGING TO FOLLOW!
- Know your schedule. When will you be able to eat? If it isn’t going to be your normal schedule, how are you going to handle it? If you don’t normally eat breakfast, but have to go out with people, are you going to be ok with just a cup of coffee so you can stick with your normal fast? Or will you maybe eat something small and healthy? Prepare yourself and decide how you will handle situations ahead of time. It always makes you feel less awkward when your mind is already made up!
- Check out meal options. What restaurant options are there? Find some options and check out the menus. Go in prepared with the healthy options you can eat. The more prepared you are the less tempted you will be to cheat.
- Don’t be afraid to bring your own snacks or cook. Vacations don’t mean you always have to eat out! I’ve brought my own snacks or even chosen to stay with friends or at places where I can cook. Heck if you are staying with friends, I doubt they will turn down a home-cooked meal (especially if you also do the dishes afterwards!).
- Use portion control. I don’t necessarily say “use portion control.” I believe in eating when you are hungry and eating till you are full. I believe that if you eat CLEAN, you don’t really have to count calories. HOWEVER, there are times when you are on vacation that you want to indulge while not destroying your diet or feeling like crap. Using some self-control and really watching your portion (aka one cookie) can allow you to indulge while not upsetting the tummy too much.
- Stay hydrated and watch the alcohol! Often when we are dehydrated we feel hungry even when we aren’t! And when we are on vacation we tend to also be drinking a lot of non-hydrating drinks (I think I made that word up!). To make sure we feel good and avoid overeating, make sure to drink plenty of water! Also, make wise alcohol choices. If you are trying to be healthy, I suggest avoiding fancy mixed drinks in favor of simple beverages. Or just make sure to have ONE fancy drink. Alcoholic beverages tend to have a lot of calories especially if they are fancier, fun drinks. Alcohol also tends to lower our inhibitions and make us crave bad food. Drinking in moderation (or maybe even not at all if you don’t really miss it) can help you stay on track!
How do you stay on track during vacation? Or are you generally like me and use vacation as a time to completely indulge?
And after the wedding…My usual indulging…Heck, when a menu has “fried chicken pot pie nuggets” you HAVE to try them!
Reaching Your Goals: Consistency Creates Habits
I often talk about being patient with yourself and not expecting perfection. I often talk about not worrying if life occasionally gets in the way and you “slip up.” I often talk about how you need to indulge and recharge every once in a while.
But there is also a flip side to all that.
While achieving your goals isn’t about being perfect day in and day out, you do have to be CONSISTENT.
The more consistently you work toward your goals day in and day out, the quicker you are going to reach them.
Often clients will get frustrated when they feel like they’ve been “good” yet they aren’t seeing great results.
Most of the time when they break things down though, they realize that “yes…they have been good, but not good for a long enough stretch in a row.”
Not “good” consistently.
I’ve often mentioned the 80/20 rule…80 percent of the time you do the things you should while 20 percent of the time you indulge in those not so healthy treats.
Eighty percent of the time is pretty darn consistent. Honestly, it’s more consistent than most people are . Twenty percent adds up very quickly.
80/20 doesn’t mean you can be good one week and then the next week slip back into old habits. It doesn’t mean you can be basically good during the week and then do whatever you please on the weekend. It doesn’t mean you can just excuse every little slip up!
80/20 really means consistently doing the right thing. It means creating habits that lead to change. And habits honestly take about 21 days to create.
That means for 21 days you have to follow the lifestyle that you truly want if you want it to create results and ingrain habits. It means you have to be consistent to adhering to the lifestyle you want.
I mentioned a bit ago that there are points where you will find you NEED to adhere more strictly to a diet and exercise program. That you shouldn’t feel like you are restricting yourself all of the time, but that there are times where it is ok to be super clean.
And one of those times is when you are trying to ingrain the habits.
I tell clients all the time that the hardest part is reaching their goal, not maintaining it.
Because once the habits are truly instilled, you won’t have to think twice about living the lifestyle you want. You won’t constantly be draining your self-control tank to eat clean and workout consistently.
So I would like to present a challenge….
Set aside 3 weeks right now. Don’t wait for the New Year to lose weight or have to worry about dieting over the holidays.
Take three weeks right now and be consistent in your healthy lifestyle. Take 3 weeks to do the right thing day in and day out.
Be strict for three weeks, ingrain those habits and realize just how much easier it is to get results when you are CONSISTENT!
Dedicating 21 days is really all it takes. Just three weeks to make a HUGE change.
Start next year off right….Create those habits NOW!
Wedding Week Part 2 – Adventure is out there!
I think that often fitness and working out is where we learn a lot about ourselves. I think it is a great way to become empowered and find the courage to be the person you want to be in your every day life.
It is a little microcosm that allows us to become the people we want to be.
I think working out is almost more important for the mental health benefits than the physical.
That being said, I’m going to stray today into the realm of sappiness and mental attitude with Part 2 of my Wedding Week series.
I think all big life events make us take time to reflect.
To reflect on where we’ve been. To reflect on what we really want out of life and who we are. To even reflect on where we want to go.
If you haven’t seen “Up,” go watch it right now! Just kidding….but seriously.
And when we reflect it isn’t necessarily the BIG EVENTS that truly stand out the most or seem the most meaningful. Actually it is often the boring little things that you can’t even fully describe that mean the most.
It is those boring little things that happen day in and day out that mold us.
Those boring little things are sometimes even the true adventures, whether or not we recognize it at the time.
I’ve done a lot of reflecting recently because of getting married…and because I was trying to figure out how to express how much I loved Ryan in my vows.
Actually it was super frustrating writing my vows. I generally have an easy time writing. I pick a topic and I just go. I rarely write a second draft. Most of the time if I have any sort of block I just walk around my apartment until the block has passed and that is often only a matter of minutes.
But with my vows nothing just seemed right. I can honestly tell you I wrote at least 10 drafts…some of them were even written in the note pad of my phone when I would randomly have an idea that seemed amazing.
In the end though, I wasn’t happy with any of them. They all seemed empty.
They stated that Ryan was my best friend….DUH.
They told funny stories about our relationship in an attempt to show our love. Like about how oddly perfect we are for each other.
But none of them could fully express just how much Ryan meant to me.
A little wedding weekend collage.
And then I stumbled onto a quote from the movie “Up.” (This by the way is one of my favorite movies and Ryan and I started our first dance to a song from this movie!)
In the movie, the little boy, Russell, tells a story to Carl about hanging out with his dad and then says, “That might sound boring, but I think the boring stuff is the stuff I remember the most.”
The boring stuff is the stuff that I remember the most….
The boring stuff is the stuff that relationships are made of…That love is made of.
It isn’t grand gestures or romantic getaways that make you love a person. That stuff isn’t LOVE.
It is the little things that happen every day. It is the boring little routines, even, that won’t interest anybody but you that truly shape things – that truly shape YOU.
It is those seemingly boring little events, routines, habits that are the TRUE ADVENTURES.
And this doesn’t just apply to love and relationships.
Honestly life, in general, should be about remembering and appreciating the boring little things because those are the things that truly matter.
At least I’ve always found that to be true.
Thinking back over the years what I remember more than specific victories (like winning the powerlifting competition) or defeats (like not hitting my goal at the kettlebell competition) is the journeys.
I remember all the hard work that I put in day in and day out. I remember that feeling of signing up for something that I’d never attempted before and then committing to training as hard as I could.
And don’t get me wrong, the big events are nice highlights, but they aren’t what truly mattered. They honestly didn’t do near as much to shape me as the journey….As the boring work I put in each and every day to reach them.
Those nondescript events, those daily struggles that looking back I can’t pinpoint, but just remember the feelings of, are what truly mattered. Those were the true adventures.
Those are the feelings that I wouldn’t trade for anything else.
So I guess after all this rambling, what I want truly want to say is, “Stop getting caught up in accomplishing something big. In doing something BIG.”
You don’t have to force some big adventure or think your life isn’t complete if you don’t do something HUGE. Adventure is out there every single day. All you have to do is be willing to put yourself out there and live.
Because 50 years from now when you look back, I honestly think more than anything you’ll be proud of the journey. Proud of the days you spent in happiness or even in struggle working to move forward, grow stronger, become more yourself.
Adventure is out there! Don’t wait for something big to happen. Go out and enjoy all those boring little things that happen every day!
Man Bicep 