So yesterday we went to a Bridal Expo to promote our gym and our Bridal Transformation Workbook, which is a year-long guide (workouts, diet tips, recipes and meal plans) to help brides look sexy on their big day.
We were at our little booth and were trying to get people to sign up for the free workbook when one of the trainers asks a group of girls, “Want to get in shape for your wedding?”
The bride of the group awkwardly laughed and made some comment about liking the way she looked.
Her response was definitely one of “well I’m thin so I’m fine!” It also maybe also had a hint of being offended that someone hinted that she would need to “get in shape.” (Even though he wasn’t hinting that at all.)
Another woman we approached responded “Well…round is a shape.” She too was saying, “I’m fine as I am and how dare you hint otherwise.”
The trainer meant no offense. He wasn’t saying the women were “out of shape.” But that is how they took it.
Which got me to thinking….Do many people not even start working toward being “in shape” or “healthier” because by working toward something like that they are hinting they aren’t already “perfect?” Are we scared to admit to ourselves that we have flaws?
Or are we scared to admit to ourselves that others may not think of us as perfect?
No one wants someone else to think that they need improvement even if we, ourselves, think we need improvement.
So someone telling saying to you, “Do you want to get in shape for your wedding” isn’t something we want to hear EVEN if we were planning on starting a program to look even better for our wedding!
Anyway, so then toward the end of the expo, I had a woman walk up to the table to look at the workbook.
She said, “Oh this is awesome!”
I said thank you.
And then she uttered something that made my jaw LITERALLY drop open…
She said,”This is for all those fat brides that want to fit into a smaller dress…huh?”
As I said…My jaw dropped open.
I laughed super awkwardly and said,”Well anyone can use it….I live by the tips in there.”
She gave me a slightly surprised look and gave me the once over.
And then I got mad.
That attitude is EXACTLY why many women were afraid to admit they were interested in the workbook.
I then said to the woman, “So don’t you want to look PERFECT on your wedding day? Don’t you want to look your best!?”
And she said, “Yes of course.”
So I said, “Then you want this workbook because it will give you a few tips to make you look your best! If you are spending time on the perfect dress, makeup and hair, why wouldn’t you make sure you do everything you can to look the best with all of the stuff you picked out!?! (I said this all very nicely even though I was slightly pissed off)
She then signed for the workbook.
I mean really…I just don’t get it. We will comment/criticize our arms or legs or butt or whatever, but then when we are faced with an opportunity to face it and change it, we shy away.
We spend time picking out the perfect dress, the perfect hairstyle, the perfect makeup because we want to LOOK PERFECT on our big day, but run as far away as we can from one of the BEST ways to make us look spectacular AND FEEL CONFIDENT in how we look!
I don’t get it. Do we not like admitting our flaws? Is it that working out is just too “HARD” compared to the other fixes?
I mean really! Working out and eating well isn’t something you do just if you are “overweight!” It is something you do to FEEL GREAT, LOOK GREAT and BE HEALTHY!
Anyway, has anyone been offended by someone selling something by saying “get in shape?” Or have you offended someone by saying this?
So Pinterest is great if you need inspiration for planning anything, even a wedding.
It also can provide you with inspiration to get in shape for your wedding.
BUT it can’t actually make you do it. And it can’t help you get results or stay on track.
However, a proper plan can!
First, set a goal and a target date. This date shouldn’t be the day of your wedding. It should be a few days before your final dress fitting.
If you don’t know how long you have to accomplish something, you won’t be able to set realistic goals OR set up a program that will lead you to success.
Once you set your long-term goal and have a clear timeframe in which to accomplish your goal, you need to break that goal down into short-term goals that will help you track your progress. An easy way to do this is to set target weights based on your dress fittings.
Now you have to figure out HOW to accomplish your goal.
Do some research and think about WHAT WORKS FOR YOU…Not what your friends say work or some magazine says is the key to success…Think about what works for you…And what DOESN’T work for you.
Do you enjoy working out at home more? Or will you not do the workout if you don’t have an appointment with someone and go out to a gym?
Do you need guidance or will you keep yourself dedicated and motivated?
Have you dieted and had success in the past? Or do you need diet recommendations?
There are some people who can go it alone and once they have a goal set will stay committed. However, there are also people out there that need some outside motivation.
The question is, which are you?
Once you know, pick a program.
In terms of workouts…Find an in home workout program that will help you reach your goals or meet with a trainer to have them design a personalized program for you.
Of course, I’m biased but I think that it is always best to have a program designed specifically for you. Even if you want to go it alone with the personalized program, getting something designed FOR YOU by someone trained in the fitness field may just help you reach your goals more quickly and efficiently.
No matter where you get your program, it should go through a progression. You shouldn’t just be going at 100% the entire time.
There should also be some weights, some slow long cardio and some short intense cardio intervals. You can’t ignore any of the pieces of the puzzle! Just running or doing cardio for hours won’t get you there!
HOWEVER, when picking out your own program or talking to a trainer, you also want to consider the types of activities that you enjoy doing. (If you enjoy running, don’t stop doing it, BUT do add in some strength training. It will not only make you look better on your wedding day, but it will also help your running!)
Don’t only consider your workout progression though, also think about how you will use your diet to reach your goals.
Read some of the great information out there about different diets and look at studies. Don’t just believe what mainstream media says!
At the beginning of your diet even experiment slightly, varying your diet. High carb, low carb. Gluten-free. High fat, lower fat. Vegetarian.
When you pinpoint something that has some success, stick with it. Develop good habits and stick with them. Then at points go a bit stricter.
You don’t want to deprive yourself. Yes there will be points during the months leading up to your wedding that you will want to be stricter about what you eat, but you never want to feel fully deprived.
Just like with your workout program, plan out a progression so that you are eating to promote great workouts while working toward your goal.
So now you have a timeframe, a long-term goal, short-term goals to check up on your progress and a clearly laid out program with a clear progression.
Now implement it! 🙂
If you need any help creating your own plan for your wedding (or any goal that you may have), let me know or contact a gym in your area.
If you happen to be anywhere near Costa Mesa, stop in to the gym I work at called Innovative Results.
Also, I’m going to start writing Bridal Transformation blogs for the site so if you want more help to get you ready for your wedding day, check them out!
To look like on their wedding day….
Toned arms and shoulders, a slim waistline with just enough curve into toned hips, butt and legs.
How do most women get there?
By doing chronic cardio, starving themselves, and lifting light little barbie weights only a month before their wedding.
But is this really the best way to have the arms, waist and butt of your dreams on your wedding day?
If you really want to look lean and toned you can’t just do cardio and you most definitely can’t starve yourself.
You need to lift challenging weights, eat the RIGHT foods and start working toward the body you want early on.
I tell my clients (and plan to do the same myself) to plan to have reached their goal weight or body composition the week before their final fitting, which is only a month or so out from their wedding.
The last month or two should only really be maintenance.
The key throughout your workout progression toward you BIG DAY is to do compound movements. Don’t waste your time with the bicep curls, shoulder presses and tricep extensions that most programs recommend. While those can be good if you are a powerlifter looking to really isolate and strengthen weak muscles, those moves really aren’t giving you that much bang for your buck.
They don’t have a whole heck of a lot of calorie burn AND they are only working on one muscle group when you could be hitting 3 or 4 with a compound movement.
For instance….the deadlift…It works just about everything. Want a great backside? Want a toned upper back, butt and thighs?
Or any other powerlifting move for that matter. Or you can use kettlebells, resistance bands or the sled
There are a ton of different strength training things that you can do! Find some that are fun and that get you results efficiently AKA compound moves!
Also choose the compound moves that target your trouble areas.
While we can’t spot reduce areas, we can build up proper muscle tone to make our problem areas look better. Eating a healthy diet and later the added cardio we do during cutting will reveal that beautiful muscle we built up even more!
And while I LOVE lifting heavy and think that it is key to the body that you dream of having on your wedding day, cardio does become a more important part as you are trying to become more lean and toned.
That doesn’t mean you just stop lifting and start logging in tons of miles.
It means sprints, some long distance JOGS for some slow fat-burning cardio AND still an intense heavy lifting routine.
Of course once you up your intensity during the final few months before your last dress fitting, you will need to remember to take time to rest, foam roll and release some stress! Working out though can be a great way to make sure that you are still getting enough “me time” BUT that doesn’t mean you can just start living in a gym and not practice proper recovery!
10 Key Moves to Get the Body We All Want on our Wedding Day! (So many move I love, but these will give you a huge bang for your buck!)
- Deadlifts – Deadlifts are a full body move. They are perfect to tone your upper back, butt and hamstrings. Plus they are a real fat burner because they work so many big muscle groups! (I LOVE YOU DEADLIFTS AND MISS YOU!) One new explosive deadlift move I’ve started using is a rotational deadlift. I set up the bar in a t-bar row hold and put weight only on one end. So I deadlift up the end with weight and rotate toward the stand as I stand up. So if the weight is on the right as I stand up, I rotate to the left pushing the weight out and up until my arms are straight.
- Kettlebell Swings – Another great way to get a great toned hips, butt and thighs! This move may be just as good as the deadlift. It is, however, just a bit harder to master. Make sure that if you want the butt toning effects of the swing that you aren’t squatting down so much as doing a hip hinge! NOT A SQUAT! More of an RDL…but still not an RDL.
- Kettlebell Snatches – Another tough move, but a full body one. Develops explosive power, which means more muscle power! It is great to develop power in your legs, tone your core (lots of rotation and stabilization) and strengthen your shoulders.
- Pull ups – I LOVE PULL UPS or any variation of them! (You can even do a pull up and hang if you want some extra core work!) They tone your back, biceps and core! Get great arms while benefiting from the extra calorie burn of working a big muscle group like your back! (And a toned back looks pretty good in a strapless wedding dress!) Plus, if you strengthen your lats, they will help your waist look slimmer by creating more of an hour-glass figure!
- Push ups – Strengthen your chest, triceps and shoulders just to name a few muscles. Lifting heavy can sometimes just mean lifting yourself! If you want to make them even more challenging, make them explosive. As you push up, come up off the floor! They make the push ups that much harder.
- Medball Pass and Shuffle – Honestly, one of my favorite new moves. Cardio because of the shuffling back and forth. Plus it is a great move to develop lean POWERFUL muscles. Best when done with a partner. Perform a chest pass with a heavy medicine ball with a partner while shuffling down and back.
- Sled pull/push – So by pulling I mean pulling a sled toward you with a rope. Great leg, core, back and arm workout! And then if you push it back to its starting place, you get to work the entire posterior of your chain – everything from your shoulders down to your calves!
- Crawls and all variations – You can pull a chain, crawl on a power wheel, or crawl using sliders. How ever you do it, it is a great workout for your shoulders and legs. AND the more you keep you butt from going up in the air, the more you work your core. If you do use a chain, you can work your legs and butt even more. Or if you use a power wheel or sliders, you can focus more on your shoulders and core.
- Battling Ropes – A great way to get the lean ton muscles you want. Depending on which wave you make, you can focus on different muscle groups. You can work your back, your shoulders, your arms, your core and your legs. Shoot rotational waves kill your core!
- VersaClimber (or really any sprints) – These are a great way to maintain muscle and BURN TONS OF FAT!